Log in

View:Recent Entries.
You're looking at the latest 9 entries.

Current Music:Love shack
Current Location:Muh chair
Subject:OH SHNAP!!!
Time:12:57 am
Current Mood:tiredtired
oh fuck!!!

All New and all fresh!
Swizz, So to wrap up the last 2 years...
sommar and i have dated...11 times...
Sam doesnt go to e-ridge anymore...
im pimp!
I met this hot chick named Allison
I think meghan is hitting on me..


and thats it for now...
comments: Leave a comment Share

Time:11:01 am
Well, here i am. I'm to continue from yesterday. Now, with full detail.
last you knew, sam was dating mike, and she hates me. well its more complicated than that.

Ok, backtrack here. I hit mike during 5th period. and well, I don't know...
Well, I went to lunch, and being mad at them, I went to go talk. Now, At first, i didnt talk to sam&mike. i went to alex first... We talked a bit, and he said some things about sam, and me...
Finally, i went to sam. she tried to avoid us... She knew i was mad...
Well, she finally sat down and listened...after we talked to mike. I said some things to her... some very personal things... I had told her [me]: sam! ok, i love you, why would you do this. I always tell, you, i try and show you, but the fact that I love you only makes you go out and date my friends, when we dont even break up!"

Well, this isn't right. See, this is where i fucked up BIG time! i walked out of lunch a little later, and thought everything was good, and i had setlled my problems...
that means im done here...

WRONG! I had not, i actually made it worse!! Sfter yelling, going to my next class, i talked to alex... He had said that sam is now crying... Good job there... I love her, try to make things better, and get her back... but i make it worse. lose her more, while she hates me.

Finally-going to art. I see her crying her eyes out. Why else... ME! the dumbass who loves to much!
I ask her whats wrong, and she says what do you think!
Stupidly, i actually say, I dont know... Becuaase, thats how i got her before, because Im sweet funny, and nice. but now, she thinks of me and mean, an ass, and a dumb-fuck!

Well, is tis the way to get back the girl you love... no...
Now, i think she'll bounce back because she does alot... I told her that i'd do anything for her... and i would. I told her "sam, don't you remember the shit i did, just to be with you"? I went out with daniell schrom! just so i could be with sam!

She was some-what happy... not enough tho...
shit... What was i to do...

I tried to talk to her, but she just told me to leave, and stop talking to her...
Not good. Becuase, I did ask her back out... Dumb thing, right after i yelled at her... She had said "That you know what adam, I loved you, and I probably would, but after that, I don't know what to think. If you loved me, you should've said so, not go and hit my boyfriend!"

Yep... I fucked up... she had said herself that she lovED me lovED, not she does, she DID! She now hates me. And i cant help it. I still love her.
Now... The bad part is... well, SHE WON"T BELIEVE ME WHEN I TELL HER CONTINUOLSLY i love you... She tells me, well, if you love me, why did you hit him. And I tell her, It is becuase I love her...

I'm not doing good here...
Nothings working and she hates me...Now, I've lost the one I love...
and... I can't do anything about it.
comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment Share

Time:08:33 pm

Now, heres my story.  This all happened, I don't know, what, about four days ago...
Now, this story is long, so you might want to find a confortable place. And a snack.

Now, this happened anout four days ago. It was a normal day like any other. I was in school, and it was good. Until, that very fate. FIRST PERIOD!!!!!!!! Now. I was talking to sam(my girlfriend at the time)and like any day, we passed notes, and we talked. Now, sam, never wanted to break up. she would question if i was going to, and if the slightest notion came to mind, she'd try to stop me. Ok, well, we passed notes, all joyfully like notihng was wrong, until about hafl way through the note, she says we aren't going out anymore. I became very pissed.
I thought it was all a crazy ploy by alex. But despite my attempts. i asked over again. and no, she was going out with mike, she was gone!
I was mad! I asked asked, and asked, and no, i couldn't get her back. she had say'd that I broke up with her two days before. Now I had to stop for a second, and find out what in the neverland ranch was going on!

I had talked to my friends, and they knew about them. They wanted to help by killing him, but i couldn't.
mike is one of my friends, and now he was dating the girl i loved, and still do!
This isn't right, he would never do this.

Now this is where you will need a tissue(box) and some heart, you bastards!

Now, I couldn't handle this. I love sam, and she was with my best friend, so during my pass to my next class, i caught up with him, and f***in' hit him!
Now after, sam got mad a tme.
during lunch,i tried to talk to her, and find out what happended
I ended up yelling at her....
I told her, why would she do this to me! Why would she go out wiht my friend.
I told her, I loved her, and did that mean anything to you

later on, I had heard she was crying because i yelled at her. Big Mistake
Just too finish up, she hates, me, wont stop crying when she sees me, and wont talk to me. Now ill be back later, Im bleeding badly!


comments: 6 comments or Leave a comment Share

Current Music:HIM
Time:10:27 pm
Current Mood:determinedArgh me maties!
Well, here I am, Writing In My journal. The day went by pretty slow. Christina and I had thought it wouldn’t end!

Really, Would this ever end, No one would ever know? I don’t think anyone wants me to have a normal life. Alex, one of my best friends, well he has been trying to make Sam and me break up. But these are faulty attempts to ruin our relationship. Little to his knowledge, he was actually accomplishing something. The thing he had accomplished though, was not breaking Sam and me up, it was breaking Sam, Alex, And me closer apart.

I just sit there, pondering, “what has happened to us” We all used to be good friends”. Never in my life could I presume that Alex and me would start losing our friendship. I mean, we always will be friends, and we still are, but we don’t trust each other. That is something that you would always be able to keep with your friends, your friendship. Which Alex, and, me are, (*sigh*) unfortunately losing. We just can’t trust each other and we are pitted against each other constantly.

Only if we could just go back to when we never worried about, “who we are going out with,” Or “who’s mine”. Alex, just today and me were fighting over Sam. Really, I couldn’t imagine me and my best friend in the world, and yes Christina, sorry, he is my best friend, but I love you too, your there, just, umm under my favorite train category, or I can put you in the friend I love the most for having the most active imagination, but, that’s besides the point.

The true point to this is, that… Alex, you’re my best friend… And you will be. I don’t care if you think you like Sam more than me. Because, I Alex, love Sam more than you could believe. These are things I could never say to any of you. Sam, I love you, and contrary thought. People say as advise, that you should dump him/her because they think you are their life. Well, I don’t say that. Because Sam I love you, but you can’t be my life. You are a major part of my life, but then that would mean if you were my life, then, without you, then I wouldn’t “have my life” A.k.a you. Which at last would mean, whenever your not around I don’t have a life.

Only, just only if my life could improve.

I don’t want to be like this, I don’t want to have forty-seven percent Goth. Well, hey; they have one hell of attire. The clothes are pretty cool. But being considered a Goth is the way you live. And the way I would be inheriting this is by hating life, losing all my friends.

Well, this is my conclusion. Alex, you are my best friend, and never in my life will I want to lose you as my friend. Sam I love you with all my heart, forever. And Christina, since I used you in this, I love you as a good friend too, because, well, were “cousins” and of all I can’t lose you guys.

-Breaking benjamin- so cold.

We are so young, our lives have just begun
but already, we are considering
to escape from this world
and we've waited for so long
for this moment to come
it was so anxious to be together
together in death

won't you die tonight for love

this world is a cruel place, and we're only to lose
before live tears us apart, let death bless me with you

...this live ain't worth living
-HIM-Join me(in death)
comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment Share

Current Music:Rammstein
Subject:Like Whoa!
Time:04:44 pm
Current Mood:hornyTime to fuckizzle!
I was like whoa, and he was like whoa, and she was like whoa!
Today, ahh! So much fun.

I was all like whoa!!!!

Ahhh, study hall, that was fun. I think tho, that erica was starting to suspect that im going out with sam.... But then later on i fugure out she doesn't care....



Well, In school, i was talking to alina during 3rd period! YAY! ALINA!

The whole thing with bobby today was ReAlY!!! Pissing me off....
He's like all over sam. It makes me so madd i just want to Stab him in the eye with a combination of a hot french fry, a pen, my fist!


WeLl! What to do...

I had slightly fun in lunch, throwing a bagel at Alex, which hit curtis, who pissed off jeremy, who tried to anal-rape me with the bagel....

So, while running from jeremy, while pissing him off, by getting away, and appering in variose, un-explanible-to-get-to places....

I got pissed worse at bobby, same reason...

then i go to health, ohh! super uber fun!
We do our presentation....and, im not talking, while sam and courtney are standing up front doing all the work, while i click the slide show.... then.... my favorite part, where i get to talk about 80% of elderly people using LSD in their life-time....HA!
Then i go on about how dangerouse and how much of lsd it takes for One!! Trip, which is 1/5 of a mg, which, one tablet, is equal to 25-30,000 trips!!!

Yepperz, it was fun!

We're all living in Amerika
Amerika ist wunderbar
We're all living in Amerika

We're all living in Amerika
Amerika ist wunderbar
We're all living in Amerika

Wenn getanzt wird will ich führen
Auch wenn ihr euch alleine dreht
Lasst euch ein wenig kontrollieren
Ich zeige euch wie's richtig geht

Wir bilden einen lieben Reigen
Die Freiheit spielt auf allen Geigen
Musik kommt aus dem Weißen Haus
Und vor Paris steht Mickey Mouse

We're all living in Amerika
Amerika ist wunderbar
We're all living in Amerika

Ich kenne Schritte die sehr nützen
Und werde euch vor Fehltritt schützen
Und wer nicht tanzen will am Schluss
Weiss noch nicht dass er tanzen muss

Wir bilden einen lieben Reigen
Ich werde euch die Richtung zeigen
Nach Afrika kommt Santa Claus
Und vor Paris steht Mickey Mouse

We're all living in Amerika
Amerika ist wunderbar
We're all living in Amerika

We're all living in Amerika
Coca Cola
We're all living in Amerika

This is not a love song
This is not a love song
I don't sing my mother tongue
No, this is not a love song

We're all living in Amerika
Amerika ist wunderbar
We're all living in Amerika

We're all living in Amerika
Coca Cola
Sometimes war
We're all living in Amerika

Why is marijuana not legal? Why is marijuana not legal?
It’s a natural plant that grows in the dirt.
Do you know what’s not natural?
80 year old dudes with hard-ons. That’s not natural.
But we got pills for that.
We’re dedicating all our medical resources to keeping the old guys erect,
but we’re putting people in jail for something that grows in the dirt?

You know we have more prescription drugs now.
Every commercial that comes on TV is a prescription drug ad.
I can’t watch TV for four minutes without thinking I have five serious diseases.
Like: “Do you ever wake up tired in the morning?”
Oh my god I have this, write this down. Whatever it is, I have it.
Half the time I don’t even know what the commercial is…
people running in fields or flying kites or swimming in the ocean.
I’m like that is the greatest disease ever. How do you get that?
That disease comes with a hot chick and a puppy.

The schools now… It is all about self-esteem in the schools now.
Build the kids’ self-esteem, make them feel good about themselves.
If everybody grows up with high self-esteem, who is going to dance in our strip clubs?
What’s going to happen to our porno industry?
These women don’t just grown on trees.
It takes lots of drunk dads missing dance recitals before you decide to blow a goat on the internet for fifty bucks.
And if that disappears, where does that leave me on a Friday night with my new high speed connection?

Masterminds are another word that comes up all the time.
You keep hearing about these terrorists masterminds that get killed in the middle east.
Terrorists masterminds.
Mastermind is sort of a lofty way to describe what these guys do, don’t you think?
They’re not masterminds.
“OK, you take bomb, right? And you put in your backpack. And you get on bus and you blow yourself up. Alright?”
“Why do I have to blow myself up? Why can’t I just…”
“Who’s the fucking mastermind here? Me or you?”

Americans, let’s face it: We’ve been a spoiled country for a long time.
Do you know what the number one health risk in America is?
Obesity. They say we’re in the middle of an obesity epidemic.
An epidemic like it is polio. Like we’ll be telling our grand kids about it one day.
The Great Obesity Epidemic of 2004.
“How’d you get through it grandpa?”
“Oh, it was horrible Johnny, there was cheesecake and pork chops everywhere.”

Nobody knows why were getting fatter? Look at our lifestyle.
I’ll sit at a drive thru.
I’ll sit there behind fifteen other cars instead of getting up to make the eight foot walk to the totally empty counter.
Everything is mega meal, super sized. Want biggie fries, super sized, want to go large.
You want to have thirty burgers for a nickel you fat mother fucker. There’s room in the back. Take it!
Want a 55 gallon drum of Coke with that? It’s only three more cents.

Sometimes you have to suffer a little bit in your youth to motivate yourself to succeed in later life.
Do you think if Bill Gates got laid in high school, do you think there’d be a Microsoft?
Of course not.
You got to spend a long time in your own locker with your underwear shoved up your ass before you start to think,
“You’ll see. I’m going to take of the world of computers! I’ll show them.”

We’re in one of the richest countries in the world,
but the minimum wage is lower than it was thirty five years ago.
There are homeless people everywhere.
This homeless guy asked me for money the other day.
I was about to give it to him and then I thought he was going to use it on drugs or alcohol.
And then I thought, that’s what I’m going to use it on.
Why am I judging this poor bastard.
People love to judge homeless guys. Like if you give them money they’re just going to waste it.
Well, he lives in a box, what do you want him to do? Save it up and buy a wall unit?
Take a little run to the store for a throw rug and a CD rack? He’s homeless.
I walked behind this guy the other day.
A homeless guy asked him for money.
He looks right at the homeless guy and says why don’t you go get a job you bum.
People always say that to homeless guys like it is so easy.
This homeless guy was wearing his underwear outside his pants.
Outside his pants. I’m guessing his resume isn’t all up to date.
I’m predicting some problems during the interview process.
I’m pretty sure even McDonalds has a “underwear goes inside the pants” policy.
Not that they enforce it really strictly, but technically I’m sure it is on the books.

comments: 4 comments or Leave a comment Share

Current Music:Death cab for cutie.....
Subject:Happy, yet dissapointed
Time:04:34 pm
Current Mood:crappyWhach-u talking bout....
Yeah, well, what the hell... Today, I don't Know how it went. It was, somewhat o.k. But....No...Friggin' School, i get up like, hella late, so im getting a late ride, and my damn bro was like making me late, soo, Your mom....

I got to school, everything was all Sure as can be, then i go to study hall, what the hell, wheres sam? She's not there! I have to sit thru a friggin class with out sam, sit in lunch, and in health without sam....Damn! This sucked like your mom! Man! I love that phrase.... Your mom!Your mom!Your mom!
I could go on forever!But, i dont think i will...Yeah, to friggin' bad

You know, i dont know what the hell is going on. Yesterday, I could of sworn me and Sam were going out, but at the end of the day, what the hell, i see her kissing chris goodbye, well maybee she didnt break up with chris, or maybee she had to keep danielle from knowing, I DONT KNOW! But i hope it's neither, and she was just and idiot that day.

Well, sam wasn't in school, i guess, it was cuz she was gone at mercy, "shadowing"
Cuz well i guess thats where shes going next year! DAMN!

Well, i hope my problems will become solved.... Man, do I really need scooby-doo right now.....


What the hell magilla gorilla!?

I'm hoping sam will be in school tomarrow.....If not, God knows what i'll do next!

Well, New york city, Ill be there in (2) days!

YAY! Ima pick me up one o' dem' hookers i've heard about.

Hey im canadian, What's dis' all aboot.




YOUR-MOM!(new and improved, now with a hyphen)



TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE-part 1,2,3 and new version part one and 2!


No uncle leather face, please dont kill me and make me into one of your masks.

Man, leather-faces uncle or what ever the hell he was....the cop guy....man he had some hairy ass eryebrows....


Leather face fell, and chopped his leg off,what a dumbass

Man, when the girl chops leatherfaces arm off, i love how the arm is still attatched to the chainsaw, while its spinning on the gruond, and he's trying to grab it but can get it....

Well, im ranting on, i think ill stop now....
comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment Share

Current Music:Mindless self indugence
Subject:Completely nothing.....
Time:08:05 pm
Current Mood:hornyhorny
Well, doesn't today suck. I like sam, and noone can accept that. I know for a fact she likes me, no one can accept it.....

Well, I started playing my lil' "i'm gunna kill my self" act, the one i started when i got dumped by kayleigh, well, it don't work. My bestest freind(schrom) hates me cuz of it. Seein' she didn't know that, when i do that, it's just for attention, not truth. Hell, i'd never do that!

During school, i had all the shit classes... But study hall was fun, and i think erica is like starting to hate me, cuz i like samm, and dont talk to erica anymore(much actually). But damn i wore those sexy Caffiene© pants today, the really high contrast white, the like super bleached white. well i liek tripped over my self a few times.....Not funny, so shut the hell up o.k...?

Well, in study hall, you know what it's besides the point, now onto s.s

He' "history", my kinda fav subject....weird ain't it?
well, I was partnered with Angel florez, roight.? He' look at me, im a drity brit!Well, in history as i like to call it, i started my sign my arm thing right....And well it led to my next subject, Health..

In health, we watched MORE movies....like usual....Well, we had some fun talking botu drugs... I had sam sign my arm, which we got in trouble for....
But a few phrases were hella funny..

Dan: Drugs, like viagra...
Teacher: whoa we don't wanto go there....

Me:*whispering to sam* "Crack babies"
sam: *breaks out laughing* again gets us in trouble....
Teacher: have you heard the phrase "crack babies"?
Again, more trouble.... im such an ass...hole...

You know i realized, all of this is besides th point.. this is the realy point of today..

My trouble all started with this lyric to the song golden-I, which I had no idea it would of meant soo much to danielle

I ain't shit, yo and that's ok cause
I wrote the note so you can watch me hang myself
Say I ain't shit, yo and that's ok cause
I wrote the note so you can watch me hang myself
-Mindless self indulgence.

Well, she belived me when this phrase states about me killing myself, but i can see why, cuz, yes i write a lot of notes, and i have trheatned to kill my self, but you know, i didnt mean to hurt danielle, i care for her, i may not like her enough to go out with her, but she's my friend, im not a shitty friedn sho say "your my frned, now go f*** off!" Not me..... I care, even if i dont like them. But she doesnt see that, cuz i hurt her, which i regret, and im sorry for.... If i could i'd take all that back. I'd never meant to hurt her, and im not gunna ramble on.. BUT ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS I REGRET IT!

Well, that's it for now.. WAIT!

Sam, our phrase CRACK-BABIES!
comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment Share

Current Music:The Rasmus....
Time:08:00 pm
Current Mood:pissed offpissed off
What the hell is wrong with life....... Iis the fucking world against me or something. I'm all happy and all, then when I get home from being with Jon, Sommar, Kayliegh, and Jaffy, I go onto the internet. About 15 minutes later I get a call, It's Sommar or i guess one of her friends, she doesn't want to go out anymore, she supposedly doesnt think we're right. WELL I SAY FUCK THAT!!!
I really don't believe that... Well life fucking sucks ass right now, and i'm fucking gunna kill everyone... She said she's going to call back but I don't really know anymore. People may not know this and if you can see this and can tell her, I LOVE HER. She may be in the sixth grade, but I don't care, I love her more than anything and I hope she knows this... Right know i'm like not doing any thing ecept typing this shit!! And Before i strt betting pissed off i'm going to start on what happend yesterday. So i was walking with sommar and such and we went to culver ridge, and we met erin katrina, lisa, and megan there, lol. So we hung out at starbucks until sommar had to leave then we hung out there more... We finnaly go to petco and we plan to buy or daughter tunis, the whole 2 year future ahead of her was planned, her bowl, her cage and THE HAMMOCK!(which megan stole!!)(along with a hell of a lot of dog cookies). Them damn cookies tasted like ANIMAL(lol)crackers... We then went to starbucks and like sat on the couch and had like a huge orgy(Not really) lol....After, we went to sommars and we had a lot of fun there, and now im scared of couches.. But It was fun so i think we had a good day...That also reminds me, when we were at starbucks today and kaylieghs like, IT'S A COUCH ADAM!!!! I'm like AHHHH!!! couches... so i guess this is it until later when i figure out the rest of the whole sommar story...

This actually isnt it i have more lol..

Today i was all sad, because my bestest friend rory(knight) is moving next week.

Read the qoutes, and the lyrics for what i feel in life right now, it will help you further understand how my life is going...

I was never afraid of what was under the bed. I wanted it. But never got it. I just became it.

No sleep
No sleep until I am done with finding the answer
Won't stop
Won't stop before I find a cure for this cancer
I feel I going down and so disconnected
I know that I am haunted to be wanted

I've been watching
I've been waiting
In the shadows all my time
I've been searching
I've been living
For tomorrows all my life

In the shadows

In the shadows

They say
That i must learn to kill before i can feel safe
But I
I rather kill myself then turn into their slave
I feel that I should go and play with the thunder
I just don't wanna stay and wait for a wonder

I've been watching
I've been waiting
In the shadows all my time
I've been searching
I've been living
For tomorrows all my life

Lately I been walking walking in circles, watching waiting for something
Feel me touch me heal me, come take me higher

I've been watching
I've been waiting
In the shadows all my time
I've been searching
I've been living
For tomorrows all my life
I've been watching
I've been waiting
I've been searching
I've been living for tomorrows

In the shadows

In the shadows
I've been waiting

-The Rasmus

I taste death in every kiss we share
and every sundown seems to be the last we have
your breath on my skin has the scent of our end
and I'm drunk on your tears baby
can't you see it's hurting???

every time we touch we get closer to heaven
and with every sunrise our sins are forgiven
you on my skin - this must be the end
the only way you could love me is to hurt me again
and again, and again....

Your love is a RAZORBLADE KISS
the sweetest is the taste from your lips


Is it so hard to believe our hearts
are made to be broken by love
then in constand dying lies the beauty of it all
my darling won't you feel
the sweet heaven in our endless cry

oh at least you could try
for this one last time

ever amazed how bright are the flames
we are burning in
ever smiled at the tragedies
we hold inside
won't you cherish the fear of live that keeps
you and me so alive

comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment Share

Subject:Just hell
Time:06:41 pm
Well, i thought today was gunna be a little better. But whatda know, it was hell. Well, school, it was ughh kinda good. The good part is i got to see sommar. But one of the worst parts was realizing i havent eaten in a week. People tell me to but i just refused and eh' i just dont feel the need to eat. Last night was kinda fun. Sommar, kayliegh, jaffy, diana, and who ever else was there(don't know names). But yeah, so i got a ride around 6:30 when i should have at 6. I got there and didnt notice sommar was there until her and kayliegh came running up to me. So we kinda just sat in the food court and talked, later we walked around and ughh did shit. Really we walked and did nothing, passed by stores because you know
irondequoit sucks to the max... We finnally went and played empty mall hyde and go seek. It was kinda fun but gay cuz the mall is empty, really the only good part was when shane and diana got caught on the escalater cuz it stopped. They were like soo gay. Then everyone found shane and he like lost so we all sat in a circle in front of the broken escalter, but kayleigh wasn't there yet. When kayliegh and jaffy got there we all sat down and some retarded black people came up to the escalater and were like "woah its not moving it stopped" and they ran down like idiots, i laughed, cuz they were like 15 and amazed, i was like, "in the 15 years you've been alive youve never seen a stopped escalater. Towards the end we went to fye and I stole a bunch of free gum so diana's like "if it's free how the hell are you stealing"? i got all pissed and like aghh. When we left it was 8 and dark so they had to walk to titus, but you know i was supposed to be waiting at the mall for my ride, and i walked only till abbots, so i ended up alking home in the pitch nigger black night across ridge road.
Ohh that was fun. But today got better i got a bunch of hugs from sommar cuz i said so, and mitch saw us and hes like are you gay, im like what, im like that was sommar, cuz the short bastard thought she was a guy so now me kayliegh jaffy sommar and cristina williams wanna kick his ass for saying that. Well i think thats it till tomarrow.. bye guys, LOVE YA SOMMAR
comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment Share

View:Recent Entries.
You're looking at the latest 9 entries.